OKLAHOMA CITY — In an effort to be more inclusive, right-wing radical and former 4Chan moderator Chase Lackawana has begun learning ASL. His first word? Cuck.
“As Steve Bannon once told me, be the change you wish to see in the world,” Lackawana said, polishing his paintball gun. “The Deaf community deserves to get skewered by my galaxy-brained talking points just like everyone else.”
Because there are not always already official ASL terms for slang words, it is up to the community to create signs for various terms. Lackawana wants to make sure he is keeping up with trends, especially if he intends to harass any Deaf “libtards” in the near future.
“I think it’s important that my fellow patriots make every effort to learn our vocabulary in ASL,” Lackawana said. “That’s why I’ve also learned the signs for snowflake, beta, antifa and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. How can we stick it to the dems if we’re not including the Deaf community?”
Upon speaking with Lackawana’s family, we learned that most of the people he is related to are actually Deaf, yet he admitted that learning ASL was not a priority until now. “I didn’t feel like it was important to be able to communicate with my mother, father, four sisters, cousins or my own baby Sean. Then I saw a TikTok of a Deaf protestor with green hair and realized it was finally time to learn ASL.”
Lackawana’s not stopping there; he is now taking a Braille class. “Sure, most blind people could probably hear me screaming ‘soy boy bluepilled cuckaholic’ in their ear at the supermarket, but hey, better safe than sorry. If I ever decide to distribute my manifestos, blind folks should be able to read them too.”
When we spoke with ASL interpreter Tahani Cort, she assessed Lackawana’s ASL proficiency. “I have absolutely no idea what that man is signing, but it’s definitely not ASL.”