Drivers are advised that all traffic on Main Street through downtown is being diverted to the business district until further notice while officials respond to what is being called a “canine-vehicle altercation.” According to police scanner activity, officers were dispatched to the Old Town Post Office at 11:43 a.m. under a “code uhhh … well, we don’t have a code for this, but they’re saying a giant dog sat on a truck and squished it to bits.” An ambulance was initially dispatched as well, but no humans or dogs were injured during the incident. Our traffic team is live on the scene, where a crowd of onlookers has gathered despite repeated requests from local authorities to disperse.
“I think the driver must be from out of town,” said Horace Bleakman, a local homeowner who came outside to investigate after he heard a loud noise and felt the ground shake. “Leaving his truck idling in an accessible parking spot like that? Anyone who knows this community knows we don’t do that here.”
“People love to make excuses,” agreed Rayla Mulberry, who saw the accident during her lunch break. “’I was only there for a few minutes!’ ‘I put a note on my windshield!’ Well that’s too bad, mister, because Clifford can’t read.”
The dog in question, a 25-foot-tall trained service animal by the name of Clifford, remained sitting quietly next to the flattened car with his handler, eight-year-old Emily Elizabeth Howard. A few onlookers shouted, “Good boy!! That’s a good boy!!” at Clifford, but they were shushed by other members of the crowd who were quick to remind them that they should not talk to service animals on duty.
The identity of the truck’s owner has not yet been released, but the man was seen confronting Howard while the remains of his vehicle were towed away. “You’re just gonna let that dog destroy my car like that? What the hell is wrong with you?”
“My mom says you are not allowed to inquire about the nature of my disability,” Howard responded. “You can only ask whether Clifford is a service animal and what tasks he is trained to perform.”