A newly published study out of the University of New Hampshire has confirmed that you’re not crazy; there are definitely some scary sounds coming from the imaging machine. Sure, the tech said not to be worried, but you absolutely noticed some extra clangs and bangs— this isn’t your first MRI. And those ear plugs? Definitely not sufficient to prevent tinnitus.
“Our findings indicate something truly alarming: Every noise you hear coming from the MRI is completely superfluous and indicative of a critical system failure,” said lead researcher Dr. Martin Billings. “You need to get the fuck out of there NOW.”
Additionally, Billings and his team found that the radiology techs are definitely gossiping about you and keeping you in there longer than necessary. “I don’t even want to tell you what they’re saying because it’s so mean,” he said. “But I personally don’t think your feet look THAT bad.”
Another key part of the research focused on whether or not everyone could see your bare ass through the gown even though you made sure to tie it as tightly as possible to your body, but those findings were inconclusive.
The team’s next study will look at whether the pain from the IV is normal or if the nurse completely fucked up your nerves in there.