Valerie Prince really wants a girlfriend. When she’s not trying, she’s too good. But when she tries, she’s a love disaster.
Prince’s favorite stim is twirling her hair, especially while sitting at a dimly lit bar and sipping on an old fashioned. Her big dark eyes, her signature outfit — exquisite faux fur coat, jet black shades and apple-red lipstick —and her habit of twisting her blond curls around her finger make the bartender blush. Whenever someone comes and sits next to her, the combo of this and her other favorite stims accidentally turns her into the beautiful, suave, “Careless Whisper” by George Michael bombshell from every movie ever.
“Whatever you say, gorgeous,” she says over and over, as unfortunately it is her current favorite vocal stim. In addition to hair twisting, rubbing her pointer finger back and forth on her lower lip is one of her top stims. Her “autistic rizz” makes the ladies swoon. But when she actually tries with the girl she REALLY likes, it’s not as smooth.
Her actual crush, Emma Goodman, leaves her clueless about how to actually flirt. She’s tried cheesy pick up lines, texting back days later to seem cool and even a “Say it’s carol singers” sign a la “Love Actually.”
“Wait, she’s flirting with me?” Goodman said when we asked for a comment. “I had no idea. I’ve liked her for years but thought she just wasn’t into me. Honestly, I thought the way she acted with me was endearing — I never would have guessed it was flirting though.”
Prince and Goodman will be celebrating their first anniversary this month. Moral of the story: Find someone who likes you just the way you are!