Thick thighs save lives. Hips don’t lie. Embrace your curves. Viva la curvy women! For the first time in generations, society is embracing and celebrating curvy women.
Some, however, got the wrong idea. The Squeaky Wheel interviewed a subject that tried to help but misunderstood the concept: the curved spine of Jodi Lee.
Following the success of our interview with “irritable” bowels, we’re speaking to other body parts of the chronically ill and disabled. For this interview, we used the services of Mistyc, a clairvoyant who specializes in communication with subjects that are normally unable to communicate. She focused her mind on Lee’s back and acted as translator between us and a curvy spinal column.
“She’s always been petite. We [Lee’s friends, family and body] all love her and don’t think she needs to change, but she wanted to be ‘curvy.’ I think I first heard her talk about it after she got really into Shakira. We’d have so much fun dancing to her music! I don’t always get to shine — I’m more just the supportive friend — but I got to really show off my moves. Muscles and I practiced a lot and got really good at it! We could move fluidly and do body rolls all day, but she felt like something was missing. So I decided to help her out and I got curvy.”
Following Shakira’s 2005 hit “Hips Don’t Lie,” Lee’s spinal column began to slowly curve to the right. The shift was attributed to the then-fifteen-year-old’s heavy backpack, but her spine disagrees.
“Please! I can handle a few books! I did this all to help her! When she went to the doctor and they mentioned scol … scaly … scoliopus … something like that, I knew I’d probably messed up. Then Gluteus Maximass decided to tell me that ‘curvy women’ doesn’t have anything to do with me. It’s a little late now!”