Squeaky Wheel Ranked ‘Worst Place for Disabled People to Work’ Because We Couldn’t Afford to Get on the Good Lists

Resource company DisabledCorp™ has published a list featuring the top companies for disabled people to work for. Ranking absolutely last on the list was Squeaky Wheel Media, the 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization responsible for the mediumly acclaimed disability satire magazine The Squeaky Wheel.

Companies gracing the top of the list include Amazon, Lockheed Martin, Walmart, a few large hedge funds and several privately owned correctional facilities. When asked how companies are ranked, a spokesperson for DisabledCorp™ told us, “We consider a variety of factors when creating these lists, including the size of the company, how many stock photos of disabled people are on their website, how many times they say the word ‘accessibility’ and whether or not they sponsored any events at this year’s DisabledCorp™ Convention.”

At this year’s superspreader convention, numerous companies hosted panels and Q&As and “fireside chats” (none of which were held aside a fire) about topics including recruiting disabled talent and the importance of workplace accessibility. The nondisabled executives remarked on how important it was to have disability represented at every level, and HR managers talked about how to find the disabled job candidates who are the least likely to require accommodations.

While Squeaky Wheel Media does use an absurd amount of stock imagery of disabled people and says the word “accessibility” frequently, we still ranked behind more notable disability allies including Citibank, Wells Fargo Bank, American Express, JPMorgan Chase, and PatriotBank Health Systems and Extreme Weapons Inc., all of whom paid the additional $2,000 for the rights to use the “DisabledCorp™ Certified Thumbs Up” badge on their websites.

PatriotBank Health Systems and Extreme Weapons Inc.’s DEI chairman, Ben Whitman, told us, “A lot of companies talk about diversity being important, but they aren’t willing to allocate budget toward their DEI initiatives. At PatriotBank Health Systems and Extreme Weapons Inc., we spend thousands of dollars on conferences, guest speakers, internal lunches, training videos and social media consultants so we are well prepared for when the day comes that we finally hire a disabled person.”

When asked if they considered Squeaky Wheel Media’s team of over 50 disabled contributors when they did their ranking, the DisabledCorp™ spokesperson replied, “Squeaky who? The one who tried to shoot Gerald Ford? Honestly I don’t even recall their application. Are you sure they paid all of the submission fees?”