In response to the growing mental health crisis in America, insurance giant WeCareCo announced a new line of laptop stickers it describes as both “life-changing” and “strong enough to stick a multi-page medical bill to the wall.”
WeCareCo President Evelyn Broth told us, “One in five adults in the U.S. experiences mental illness, which means millions of people need access to lifesaving care. But studies do show that fun little sayings adhered to your computer or reusable water bottle are just as good as the professional help we don’t feel like paying for! Yes, we funded these studies instead of covering mental healthcare for our customers, but we truly think they’re cute.”
1. Okay, so maybe what you’ve “got” is a lot of unreturned voicemails to your insurance company begging them to pay for something out of network.
2. Remind yourself that self-care is free! As long as it involves looking out a window, taking a deep breath and not getting actual “care.”
3. We’re feeling good about how much money we’re making not covering standard medical care, but have you tried not being depressed? It could be the change you need!
4. No, you don’t have a trained professional to talk to about how you pay hundreds a month for an insurance plan that no provider accepts. But if you bought this sticker that means you might have a LAPTOP. Colonial time people would be soooo jealous. Don’t you feel better already?
5. Yelling at WeCareCo agents about how the only therapists in our network are “technically” in the Principality of Monaco (and not taking new clients ever again) makes them sad! Try thanking us for that jazzy hold music you listened to for 78 minutes and make our reps smile!