Oopsie! Neurodivergent Man Pays Billions to Destroy Disabled Space

Elon Musk, pointless billionaire and Aspie supremacist, took over Twitter a few weeks ago. Since then, the social media site has become a flaming cesspool of incompetency. In just days we’ve witnessed mass layoffs at the company (including disabled employees), impossible work standards issued by Musk, increased danger for marginalized people and more. 

Twitter is on life support thanks to Musk’s overall lack of business smarts, and its death would spell trouble for the disability community. Needless to say, disabled people are feeling more than a little betrayed by the neurodivergent narcissist.

For all of the bad things that have happened on Twitter (and there certainly were a lot of bad things), it was one of the few online spaces where disabled people could communicate with each other, share GoFundMes and get topics trending to raise awareness or protest. But what happens when a reckless man with an ego the size of his bank account decides to intervene just because he wants to? Everyone suffers. 

Alison B is one of countless members of Disability Twitter. “I don’t have the spoons to leave Twitter and try and reconnect with everyone I’ve met on multiple other sites. Mastodon is inaccessible to me, and you’d have to pay me to use TikTok. All I want to do is talk about my multiple sclerosis and share a disability meme or two. But, like, one of the actually funny ones from within the community because we do have a sense of humor — something Elon clearly lacks.”

What’s the next move for the “Citizen Kane” cosplayer? We spoke to the Ghost of Elon Yet to Come, who promised this bleak future: “Fines, lawsuits, court appearances, and a generally negative public image, all blows to his ego. Even if he does make amends and actually improves Twitter, he’s a terrible role model for anyone, regardless of ability.”

In stressful times like these, it seems Musk could really benefit from a supportive community, one where he could listen to other neurodivergent people and learn new techniques for how to cope after making such big mistakes. It’s too bad there’s not a platform like that.


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