After nearly 18 months of a global pandemic, it seems a more normal future is quickly approaching. This morning at 9 a.m., President Biden participated in a symbolic ceremony that will be remembered in history as a moment of victory.
As crowds of thousands, mostly unmasked, packed tightly in front of the White House steps on a sweaty July morning, President Biden came out and announced he believed the United States has officially reached herd immunity against the COVID-19 virus.
To quell skeptics, a small group of immunocompromised children was brought up to the front and instructed to remove their fabric masks. President Biden then stepped forward and released what could only be described as the most fatherly of dad sneezes ever to have been sneezed, and nasally roared as his senior mucus sprayed across their adorable cherub-like faces.
After a moment of silence he exclaimed, “Can you believe we can finally do this again?” sparking the crowd to erupt in applause.