Dick pills, dick pills, dick pills! The latest edition of quarterly magazine Men’s Wellness consists almost entirely of reviews, advertisements, and medical deep dives on phosphodiesterase type 5 (PDE5) inhibitors — commonly referred to as “dick pills.”
Expansive marketing in recent years has broadened the target demographic for dick pills to sexually active men of any age, making dick pills a pillar of modern masculinity. Previously, physicians prescribed medications such as Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra to aging men in response to humiliating sexual impotence (euphemistically called “erectile dysfunction.”) But now, even young, healthy men are taking lower-intensity dick pills from brands like Blue Chew, Hims, and Roman, which are readily prescribed and shipped via frictionless, no-proof-needed online medical applications.
But is that such a bad thing? According to penis academic Dr. Wes Archer: yes, it is. “People talk about various crises of masculinity, and it can be tough to tell the difference between panic and reality. In my opinion, the concept of men’s health is being reduced to cartoonishly pornographic standards of sexual prowess, and ‘men’s medicine’ has become synonymous with erection maintenance.”
He continues: “There are people who assume that as the historically well-endowed class, men must be years ahead of women and nonbinary people on their overall health development. This is a myth. Physical self-neglect is a major issue for men, and that has created a crisis of health illiteracy and penis obsession. It’s a hard bit to swallow.”
A key problem, Archer says, is that for any hour of media programming to male-dominated audiences, five to ten minutes are given to product placement for dick pills.
“Listen to enough podcasts or watch enough sports, and you’ll be beaten over the head with messages that men are somehow living below their sexual potential. Take into account that most of them really are inadequate, clueless dorks, and it’s the perfect storm for millions of men to believe they can’t live without BlueChew.”
The solution? “We need a smarter culture and less dick pill propaganda.”
This article was brought to you by BlueChew.