Have you ever found yourself complaining about standing? Well, now there is research to back you up! According to a new study released yesterday, standing fucking sucks.
For years, many researchers have wondered if standing fucking sucks, and they have finally found evidence that it does. The study clearly shows that about 30% of the time, standing sucks a little bit, and about 70% of the time, it fucking sucks a lot.
To some, this information comes as a huge shock. To others, not so much. We talked to a group of people with various chronic pain and mobility issues, and one able-bodied retail worker for some reason. (We aren’t quite sure how they got in?)
They all had the same response to the news: “Duh!”
There has been some controversy surrounding the study, as it seems that one of the researchers may have connections to the sitting industry. Others argue that these possible connections are irrelevant when you look at the wider context of the standing industry’s influence over time.
“Big Standing is deeply corrupt, and has been funding biased studies for YEARS!” said Zoe Pierce, a supporter of the study. “Maybe this will finally start to balance the scales. And no one is stopping people from continuing to stand, so I don’t see the problem! This study is just acknowledging reality. Everyone can decide for themselves what to do with the information.”
Results from a study exploring if showering sucks are expected soon. Stay tuned!
Standing sux 100%