Hi there, valued customer! Here at this organization, we take notice of our disabled clientele and their unique needs — and do our best to disregard, ignore, or better yet, exasperate them to the fullest possible extent!
It is our mission to make this process as mind-numbingly annoying and frustrating as we possibly can. Is there anything we could do to make your experience navigating this awful, ableist, bureaucratic nightmare any more tedious and demoralizing? Just say the word! Our goal is to make your time interacting with us as unpleasant as possible.
We have always done our best to fill our customers’ lives with unspeakable volumes of absolute horseshit, and disabled people are no exception to our special brand of hell. In fact, wouldn’t it be more ableist to try to deny you the full experience? We certainly like to think so! And before you ask us whether we considered making this process less hellish, we want to assure you: of course we did, but we ultimately decided against it!
We get paid either way, you know? It just seems like a waste of resources, time, and potential profit to make people’s lives easier when we can simply annoy them to the point of exhaustion. Believe it or not, it improves our retention rate!
So if there’s any additional misery, frustration and ableism we can inflict upon you, cherished client, please do not hesitate to let us know. We are always looking for new ways to make your experience worse.
So true! The emploer version is sadly so very similar.