For years, disabled people have been asking not to be called “handicapped,” “differently abled,” “special needs” or any other patronizing nonsensical label that your kindhearted aunt can think of. Avoiding the term “disabled” stigmatizes disability as being gross or inappropriate. And for that reason we normally say, “Disabled is not a dirty word.”
But tonight, as I give your cute disabled self this champagne and bouquet of roses? It is a dirty word, you little disabled hottie.
You see, nondisabled people just don’t have such open minds — or as many pillows. They don’t have an adjustable bed that rises and vibrates or as many lotions and ointments as disabled folks do. A little numbing cream goes a long way.
Others might think limited mobility leads to limited thinking, but with a sexy disabled person like you? Show me what those years of learning to adapt to an inaccessible society have taught you, baby. Teach me about deep breathing exercises and stretching before strenuous activity.
Also, I heard your friend with EDS is flexible and that her roommate with BPD has BDE? And are those things they say about neurodivergent people … true?
With your pill bottles listing side effects like “insomnia,” “rapid heartbeat” and “uber-mega-horniness,” I’m sure your medicine won’t slow you down. And if it does, we can just cuddle under that electric blanket with some heating pads and your “neck massager.”
Happy Valentine’s Day, you disabled freaks.